Does that make me Different?I wear make up. Does that make me fake?I cry. Does that make me emo?I have male friends. Does that make me slutty?I smile a lot. Does that make me weird?I laugh loud. Does that make me preppy?I have anxiety. Does that make me a freak?I have Bipolar Disorder. Does that make me abnormal?I respect people. I change for me, and only me. I have a past, but I know I have a future.Does that make me different?Maybe.But at least it makes meMe.
RelapseIt’s like countingSaturn’s rings,hash marksalong your limbs -remembering a timewhen‘just one more’made you feel better.- & you’re sitting therewondering whyDraco, stuck in limboalways looks like he’sfalling.
FrostbiteNumbnessI can’t feel my toes and at first I thinkIt’s just my toes.I can cover them up.I can warm them. It spreads, like fire,Like ice.I glance away for a second, it seems, and my feet are coldPat –patThat’s funny, I didn’t feel thatMaybe I’ll cover them up tooI’ll warm them up. I’ll take a napMaybe a short rest will make it all better, warm themUp…What’s that? How long has it been?My legs… are you still mine..Why has my breath left me, short?Has everything but deserted me? What about you, are you still here?Are you still with me?Hello?And before I can say goodbye, I think my thoughts are leaving me too –
Sleeping Beautyshe’s in love with a character whonever existed but in the labyrinth of her head:a patchwork composition of beautiful, lengthy wordsshe’d heard in her catatonic state; coma livingday in and day out, reliant on the salvationof a man made of foreign wishingand imperfection and necessity – an ignorance of the less than ideal perception of self she’d come to fear, absention stained romantic to the pointwhere daydreams were a standard for survival(real living is for the purposeful of heart,he loves her in her sleep)
UneditedWe cry.We scream.We fight for our dream.We scream.We cry.We're just waiting to die.The same emotionswith a different drive.Sometimes dead, sometimes alive.The same in one way,different in anotherbrother and sister, sister and brother.So close in feeling,so different in the end.Falling apart, or finally on the mend?Which am I?Will I ever know?Fighting to stay or ready to go?Maybe I'm both,in some impossible way.Emotions oddly mixed everyday.Wouldn't surprise.I'm such a freak.Excuse me, I laugh, I should call it "unique"
WorthlessWorthless,the name that cuts like a knife,Me,it's all that you see inside,My heart,is breaking with every breath I takeThe lies,the only thing I can't seem to face.
Happily AloneHonesty,She does not have,Personalities,She has many of them.A million shields,a million personalities,She's always changing, to fit every person around her.If one were to ask why,she would answer with,I will never reveal my weaknesses, because she's evil.She hates everyone,stupider than her is barely tolerable, smarter than her is too scary, She hates it all.She leaves the world behind,To one she has dreamt of,No color, nobody else.Then, she will smile,why,because she is truly happy alone.She is not evil,She does not hate you, She is not dishonest,She simply wants to be alone.
wallflower clippingsthere's scar tissue in her throat,swollen around the words she never said;dark rings around her eyeslike planets unremembered, anda staleness to her touch,the crystalline Dead Sea.she's living like a storythat's already been told"if no one loved youwould you mean anything at all?"in that moment, we forget to exist.
We are the King and Queen of Broken DreamsStanding still in a mine field, staring at all we have left.We were so young, we didn’t stop to think.Now we’re in a car crash, teetering on the brink.If you were to leave me now, I don’t know what I’d do. It was a whirl wind romance,A light when all was black, a spark of something when all was bleak.You swept me off my feet and made me feel brand new.I thought we could live forever and I’m certain you did to. We built a house without foundationsAnd now we’re falling down,Everything’s crumbling around us, time slipping through out fingertips.People used to walk past us but they were to drunk to see,That our lives are coming apart around us, there is no light as far as we can see. There was no fire to start with,Just two broken things, the world had left behind.The casualties of other people’s dreams of power, money and control,Spat out onto the curb to rot away and die.We never stood a chance or so
lifelinesI fear the sound of sparrowsand the density of leavesagainst dew-muffled blades of grass,and I'm drowningin the sky.My skin has learned howto peel itself off without causing a commotion in my marrows or even show the slightest hintof pain,and my heart has learned howto hush the stars in their wakeand keep it all a secret.There's a sea in my mouthand I can't swim. There are lifelines cast like these and it will all end with the same tragedy.
Battle in my MindEat. Don't eat.Take it easy. Work out until you pass out.Get help.Tell someone. Keep it a secret. It's only for you and me.You're perfect. You're worthless.You're beautiful. You're disgusting.Why won't you listen? They don't understand.Let me help you. You don't understand.Show me. No!I love you..
Falling off the EdgeDo you know what it feels like?To nearly fall off the edge,but not quite...just so that you're dangling;clinging for your worthless lifelest it fall into the sea of loneliness. Your callused, pink fingers turningto a shade of purplish-red of painas it does it best to hold on.Splash.In the sea of loneliness,everything is crisp, translucent. There is nothing around you,you are alone...unlike other people,you have no one clamouring to save you;you have no onediving in to get you out.There is no pointscreaming for help,you will only wastethe little time and air you have left. You only have the darknessof the sea envelop
of seafoam thronesFrom Atlas’ hands she wept to me,atop Africas and South Atlantics;this is one situation unaffected byember eyes and windy lashes(it has no anatomy).You are sparrows strandedin tiny crevices and cliffside love,though you rebuke flightin the fear of chipping feathers. So what do you do?You reach for my soul,coveting flight with shakingdainty arms…and perhaps I’ll let you:With flytrap lips and glass shaped hips…you are unfit for anything butsight.(But beauty isn’t everything)
Honesty Written from the heart.No eraser.
Her SideTomorrow she'll be gone,but what can you say?Nothing can help her.The pain won't go away.But she would've stopped,you could've said no.That's what she wanted,someone to say don't go.That someone wanted her,or at least would try.That someone would grieveif she were to die.But you just stared,nodding your head,and she realized the truthwith a feeling of dread.No one wanted her.No one cared.Not even you,with the the love you shared.So she said good-bye,and you watched her leave.She may have had the rope,but now you can't breathe.
Day 10 - Breathe AgainOh god no.Not now,You were fine!Just two minutes ago.Whats happened?Whats wrong?Why do all these doctors need to be here?Why are they poking my Auntie Joyce?We were sat in a little room,Enjoy Christmas dinner,When Uncle Bob brought out the turkey,Roasted right to the spot.My daddy did the honors,Slicing it up.One by one,The plates filled,Making my tummy rumble.medicsWhen suddenly she was on the floor,And began to tremble,And i was pulled away,To another room.But then some unexpected guests arrived,All clad in green,And they carried doctors bags,Like the ones i had when i was three.In the con
BreatheOne of these days,The breath i am holding,I will be able to releaseOne of these days,How much you hurt me,Will disappear,Fade into nothing.One of these days,The scar you left me will fade,Clear skin left behind.One of these days,I will be able to breathe again.Without fear,Without dread,That you may attack again.One of these days,When i look back,That alley way where you did the act,Will be a far off memory.One of these days,The imprint of the feel of your hands,Roaming,Groping,Will no longer be there,Over taken by other aspects of my life.One of these days,I will be able to breathe again.
NumbI can't function.I feel numb. Lifeless.All my body is doing is crying.Tear. After. Tear. Why does it hurt so much? Why do i wish i had a blade in one hand, And blood spilling out of the other? How could one person, One boy, Make me feel so much pain. So much,Crippling, Pain.How can the guy,Who i was supposed to,Trust,Lean on,Ask advice off of,Love,Betray me.So harshly.So evilly.With out even a second glance.
Only HumanWho let these monsters in the world?Allowed them to roam free?Who let them set fire to nature,Watch burning trees?They came,They made mistakes,And yet they have not left,Now what on earth are we to do?I say they,Yet i suppose in a way,I am one of them too..So very sad to say...They trip,They fall,Their clumsy,They make so many mistakes.But in the end,It's only fair to say,That we can not expect any more,Because they are,Only Human.
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